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Get on the Horse! - Handling Trade Requests with Grace

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I think it's no secret that I love this site. I practically have it tattooed on my upper arm in a great big scented heart. Every day, I ogle the goodies in the gallery, and occasionally, when I think I have time to make an ATC, I even ask people for trades.

Now, I have zero illusions about being the most desirable artist on this site. On a scale of Angelina Jolie to someone whose head has been gnawed off by wolves, let's just say I can't really see you with all these teeth in my eye. That said, I am also fun and engaging and smart and above all else, a human being. When I write a PM and ask for a trade, I have a basic expectation: That I will receive a PM in return.

Sometimes, that means that people have to say no to me. I'm fine with that, by the way. If everyone in the world liked my stuff, I'd be filthy rich and far too busy to trade art anyway.

I do recognize, however, that it's unpleasant to reject someone, which is why I want to urge all of us to BUCK THE HECK UP!

Silence makes people feel bad. Silence can also make you seem like a stuck-up jerk. We are a lovely community of wonderful people who are kind and thoughtful and down to earth, so please don't hide in the guilty refuge of silence!

Here are some ways to handle a trade request from someone whose work you don't necessarily care for.

1) Say that you have already traded the card and forgot to mark it traded in your gallery.

2) Say that someone else just asked for the card.

3) Say that you've asked someone else for a trade and are holding onto that card, thinking they might want it.

4) SAY YES. Seriously, I love you, but you're not Picasso, and your card is not a $1.7m dollar artwork on the auction block. Sometimes, you might want to ask yourself if it's really THAT BIG OF A DEAL to trade a card of yours for a card you don't 100% adore. Look at the example of Amerasu, who pretty much takes all trade requests on a first-come, first-served basis.

5) Ask if the person is willing to make you a custom card on a theme you collect.

In short, say something. There's a person on the other end of that trade request who likes your work and would love to have that little piece of it. You don't have to say yes, but don't say nothing.
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  1. CindyD -
    CindyD's Avatar
    Just found this! People should read it. Do people even know about this blog business? I don't think I am guilty of not replying to trade requests. If so, it was not on purpose! Mostly I will say yes, if my card is marked available and someone asks.

    I do suggest people don't offer a specific card in trade. Usually when I ask for a trade, I say I have a few available and ALSO I would be willing to make a new card in return. It's totally fine if you don't have time to do that! It's just one method.

    I have been met with silence once or twice. And yes, that means I have a poor impression of those people. Because it's not nice and why did you join this site anyway?

    In closing, what AnnD said.
  2. Colourfulleigh -
    Colourfulleigh's Avatar
    I totally agree - to be ignored is simply insulting and definitely says a lot about the person doing the ignoring. We're here to TRADE after all.
  3. jmmbarkovich -
    jmmbarkovich's Avatar
    Touche, AnnD, CindyD and Colourfulleigh! One may wonder if you need a secret decoder ring to obtain a response.
  4. Veterok. -
    Veterok.'s Avatar
    I might sometimes appear silent because I just have so much going on in my life that I forget to answer messages, ie. I read a message when I get the e-mail notification of it, but then completely forget to answer when I visit the forum next time.. It's pathetic but it happens. I have however answered all trade requests, I think! : D

    I'd also like to add that to me it's much nicer to get "I don't dig your stuff that much" as an answer rather than a lie that the card has already been traded or something. I guess it's just principle, it feels nicer when you know that people are honest to you.
  5. CindyD -
    CindyD's Avatar
    I would also prefer to know, Veterok. But I can't say whether that's true for everyone. Also, I've forgotten to update my cards a few times. Ugh.

    Meanwhile, in the last week I had someone not respond. But, I also responded late to 2 AFA requests. I imagine we're all doing the best we can. : )
  6. TF Balding -
    TF Balding's Avatar
    I totally agree... Being ignored sucks.
    If I'm ever guilty of not responding to a request--PM me again! Sometimes my phone does weird things & messages don't get sent like I think they did. Cause I've totally had a few pm's go unanswered & it really does leave you wondering... & questioning the trade value/quality of your own art or if someone ya thought was pretty cool is actually kinda rude--sucks big balls.

    Whether you prefer being told that your art isn't what that person is looking for or if you prefer a sweeter lil white lie, almost anything is better than being left hanging.
  7. Juanita Rojas -
    Juanita Rojas's Avatar
    I agree, too. I was ignored once on this site, and once I was actually told that I could have one of that person's "lesser cards," gee, that sucked humungous balls. It's too bad because I really WANTed that person's art......but now I have bad feelings about that person, what a rotten stinkin shame. Thank you for all this, though. I will take it all to heart. Most everyone else is so lovely it brings tears to my eyes....
  8. Janet -
    Janet's Avatar
    omg, 'lesser card'. I sure hope you told 'em where to stick it, and sideways!!!
    Thank goodness the majority here are so lovely and encouraging.
  9. Moonfairy -
    Moonfairy's Avatar
    I remember when I first started to make and trade ATCs, aaaaall the way back in 2007 while expecting my second child. Looking back on those cards they were really REALLY bad.... they wouldn`t let me become a member in here let me tell you, lol (seriously), but most of the people I traded with were the most incredible and talented artists.
    During the years I have learned so much, and improved in so many ways.... and I`m sure one of the reasons for that is the encouraging wonderful people I traded with back then
    DRAGONSTARR's Avatar
    I think I have responded to all requests for trades, if I haven't I sincerely apologize. Sometimes I do not come to the site all that often, months even, but I try and respond to personal requests.
  11. Juanita Rojas -
    Juanita Rojas's Avatar
    I've been ignored a couple of times on this site, and it is hurtful and yes, any kind of response is better than nothing at all. In fact, once I asked for a trade and added "This is the third time I've asked for a trade with you and didn't get a response, so if I don't hear from you this time I won't bother you again." I got a response something like "Wha??" (But nothing like "Sure, let's trade," just "Wha??" It's so easy to give one of Ann's nice excuses!!